


i've chosen to love you like this; quietly.

by storm_before_the_calm



Category: Sex Education (TV)
Genre: Complete, F/M, Mild Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:40:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25077013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storm_before_the_calm/pseuds/storm_before_the_calm
Summary: "Maeve?" Her heart got stuck in her throat and she turned around. She tried to say that she had made a mistake coming and she should go, but one look at him and she couldn't bring herself to. She looked into his eyes and smiled at him. Looking at the blue in his eye right now against the dim light made her breath fall short and she's convinced that that alone is enough to make her pain disappear.ORMaeve goes to Otis' house and they talk.
Relationships: Eric Effiong/Adam Groff (mentioned only), Otis Milburn/Maeve Wiley
Comments: 33
Kudos: 105





	1. falling like the stars.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever fic and I was really nervous to post it but then figured why not. I'm not a brilliant writer and I haven't had anyone check this so if there are mistakes / spelling errors, sorry!<3  
> In case it isn't clear, the italics are thoughts.  
> Work Title inspiration is from a poem by a man named Rudy Francisco.  
> Chapter Title is James Arthur's song, Falling like the stars. Recommend listening to it before reading <3

Maeve shut the door to Issac's caravan and made her way through the mobile homes towards the hill. She walked up the hill and looked up at the stars. They looked beautiful in the dark sky. Maeve hated cliches, but sometimes she liked to sit on the steps of her caravan and stare at the stars. She'd dream she was somewhere else. Somewhere she didn't feel misplaced, and she didn't feel so alone. She shivered against the breeze of the cool night and pulled her jacket tighter around her. Part of her regrets going over to Issac's. She had messaged Aimee to see if she wanted to stay over but she was busy celebrating the Quiz heads championship win with Steve, and Maeve curled her nose at the idea of being the third wheel in that situation, so instead she went over to Issac's - a last attempt of not being on her own for a while. 

Her emotions were all over the place. She started thinking about her day as she headed down the road to the shop. Part of her was happy; they'd won the championships and she had actually worked with the team in order to get there. That is something to be celebrated in itself because Maeve was very much a lone wolf. She was glad they could make it work. However, a much bigger part of her was sad. She is alone again. She had just got used to the idea of getting woken up early by Elsie sitting on her hair or poking her in the face. She's a dickhead anyway, Maeve thought, trying to push down any other emotions she was feeling. If she was being honest though, she was just angry. Really angry. She was angry at Erin for being a shit mum. For not being able to sort herself out for the sake of her children. For leaving then coming back whenever it suited her. And she was angry at Otis. Otis was an idiot, and he hurt her. He knew what he was doing, and she wishes he would just apologise so that she didn't have to turn to Issac for company. She was angry at herself. For letting herself fall into the trap of being surrounded by people she loved deep down, because no one is in your corner but you - and now she's alone again. Because that's all that mattered. Everything led back to the fact that she was alone. She sighs into the cool air and wishes she'd just gone to bed. 

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she hadn't even noticed she had missed the turning to the shop, and she was almost outside Otis' house. As much as he hurt her and she was angry at him, she knew the only person she really wanted to be with right now was Otis. She reached the top of the steps which led to his front door and stopped. The outside light was on. She didn't have the courage to knock the door just yet, so she sat on the top step willing herself to knock but backing out each time. After what felt like ages, she picked herself up. She kicked herself for being so pathetic and turned to walk away back toward the shop. As she turned, she heard a voice from the short distance.

"Maeve?" Her heart got stuck in her throat and she turned around. She tried to say that she had made a mistake coming and she should go, but one look at him and she couldn't bring herself to. She looked into his eyes and smiled at him. Looking at the blue in his eye right now against the dim light made her breath fall short and she's convinced that that alone is enough to make her pain disappear. Otis goes to say something else but Maeve cuts in - 

"Could we talk?"

Otis looked visibly nervous, "Is this about my message?" 

"Message? No, I don't have my phone with me. Was it important?" 

_Yes_ , Otis thought. But instead he said "no, did you want to come inside?" she nods and he leads her down the steps into his house. 

Maeve has been inside Otis' house before. Just once, for his party. She winces at the memory; _I think Maeve is the most selfish person I've ever met_ , and all at once her heart breaks again. Maeve shakes her head and tries masks whatever feeling just sprouted in her stomach making it's way to her throat. She looks around his house. It looks different than it did at the party. It's more homely, in the sense that there are photos on the walls of Baby Otis and his mother. It also was neater, but not painfully neat like Jackson's house. This house looks more cosy and lived in. She liked it. It looked like a home. Otis' voice pulls her out of the thoughts.

"I'm sorry about what I said to you. It wasn't true, and I was just trying to hurt you because I was hurt. You're my friend, and the most unselfish person I know." Maeve scoffed at the last part. Unselfish people do not ring social services on their own family. Otis waited for an answer but didn't get one, so instead got two glasses of water. He wasn't thirsty at all, but he just needed to do something. He sat down at the dining table and Maeve sat down next to him. The tension in the air could be cut with a knife. Both of them were desperate to fill the awkward silence but nothing ever came. Thankfully, Jean walked into the kitchen and filled the quiet. 

"Otis darling, you're home. And who is this? I don't think we've met." 

"Hello, Dr Milburn, I'm Maeve. Sorry to show up so late, I can go." Maeve rises in her seat to leave and Otis grabs her wrist and seats her back down. 

"Call me Jean, please, and don't apologise. Any friend of Otis' is welcome here anytime." Jean smiled. Maeve thanked her. She spoke with Maeve and Otis for a while, even though to them all it only felt like ten minutes. She told Maeve about when Otis was little and all the silly things he used to get up to, she shared that she'd lost her job at the school and she also reassured Maeve that if she wanted anything in life, all she needed to do was work hard and do her best. Maeve would like to believe her but she thinks luck plays a large role and if Maeve was being honest, her's was shit. _Jean is what Mum's are supposed to be like_ , Maeve thought. _A little bit embarrassing, a little bit nosy, but more than that, she was caring and she was kind._ Jean went to bed around 11pm, and Otis and Maeve went to up to his bedroom. 

"Your mum is really nice," she said, "nothing like I thought she was going to be." 

"Oh yeah? What did you think she'd be like?" Otis asked, genuinely curious. 

Maeve suddenly felt on the spot. Her idea of a Mum wasn't exactly the best. Erin was a rubbish mum. Jackson had two mums, one who was really overbearing and the other who would do anything for him. "I guess I thought she'd be meaner," she decided to go with. "Maybe a bit more sex-crazy.." she added and then laughed to herself. Otis laughed too. Then the energy in the room changed and Otis turned to look at Maeve. 

"What did you want to talk about?" Otis asked. 

Maeve slumped on the end of his bed and let her body fall to lay across it. "I've had a really shit day," she breathed out sadly. Being with Otis almost made her forget about everything that had happened. When she was with him, she didn't feel like 'Cock-biter Wiley' or the girl who lives in the caravan park, she just felt like Maeve. Otis moved to sit next her on the bed. 

"You're right - today was rubbish. But wait - you won the Quiz head championships, shouldn't you be over the moon, celebrating?" 

"There's more to life than that, Otis." she snapped, and moved to sit upright. 

Otis put his hand on her arm. "Are you okay, Maeve?" 

"Erin's gone," she said bluntly. "I rang social services before the show today because she'd been using drugs again. They came and took Elsie, and Mum went with them. She was so angry, Otis." Maeve glanced at Otis. If she looked any longer she's convinced she would burst into tears. "She kept yelling at me saying that she'd never forgive me and you can't really blame her. I should've talked with her first, I should have just waited it out, I could look after Elsie until she was better. But I didn't - and now they have gone and I am on my own, again." she looked at the floor, willing herself not to cry. 

"Maeve, I am so sor-" 

"Don't say you're sorry," she cut in. "At least now I won't be waiting for her to run off again. I'm fine with being on my own. It's one of the only things I know how to do without fucking it up." 

"Maeve, that's not true." Otis turned and lifted his leg onto the bed so he was facing Maeve. "You are not alone, Maeve. You have people. You have Aimee, and me, and Eric, and those two neighbours who argue constantly," Maeve laughed to herself at the thought of turning to Cynthia and Jeffrey for help. 

"I don't have a family though." Maeve said sadly, and she wasn't wrong. "My mum is a drug addict, my Dad ran off before I can remember. My brother is a dickhead. At least Elsie is little enough to get out before this family fucks her up too." Otis didn't say anything, so Maeve carried on talking. "Family is important, you know? You need a parent. Parents are supposed to look after you, and teach you stuff." 

"You are so smart, I don't think there's anything a parent could teach you that you don't already know." 

"How to love yourself," Maeve added quietly. Otis was slightly taken aback because it was so unlike Maeve to say something like that, so he just listened and let her speak. "I mean, how are you supposed to believe that you're lovable when the only people who are supposed to love you unconditionally walk away? A Mum is supposed to reassure you when you feel uneasy, help you choose what to do after school, help you pick out your dress for the dance - but my mum chose drugs." she scoffed. 

"My mum would do that for you." Otis felt his cheeks turn red because the thought sounded stupid after he voiced it. He kept talking though, because Jean would be there for Maeve and Maeve should know that. "She would be that person for you. If you ever need reassuring, or advice, or help, my mum will be there for you. But... you may have to tolerate her hugging you every once in a while," Otis added in an attempt to lift the heaviness of the situation. 

Maeve smiled properly for the first time that night, "I think I could tolerate a hug." 

And that was the end of the conversation. Maeve wiped her hands across her face and into her hair and looked at Otis. 

"Tell me about your day." It wasn't a question, and she wasn't really expecting his day to be that eventful. She just didn't want to have to leave his house yet; she could talk to him forever. Otis told her about his meeting with his Dad. "I caught him cheating with a client when I was younger, and soon after, he left. He broke my Mum's heart and I'm pretty certain she's never loved another man since him. He's been pretty much absent my whole life. I blamed myself for him leaving, because I told my mum about it, then I blamed my mum because she made him leave. Now I realise he was just an arsehole and it wasn't anyone's fault but his." 

"Do you miss him?"

"Yeah actually. I guess I just wish he'd stuck around for me. I know things were bad for Mum and him but I was still his kid," Otis shrugged.

"Parents suck" Maeve nudged him. Otis nodded in agreement, and then told Maeve about the rest of his day. He told her about the 'Sexy Shakespeare' play and how he had to defend his Mum against Mr Groff. He told her about Adam holding Eric's hand which resulting in a lot of no way's and giggles. 

"I also went to your place. That's where I had been, when I found you on the steps." 

"Why?" Maeve looked confused. 

"I wanted to congratulate you on your big win... and I also wanted to, um, tell you to listen to my... message. When I got there I found out that you had gone to the shop and I told Issac to tell you." Otis hesitated. _Shit Issac_. Part of her felt guilty for bailing on him without a word, but the other part - the bigger part- really didn't care.

"He's not my boyfriend." Maeve blurted out before her mind could shut her up.

"Oh, okay. You seemed very close at the party." 

"No, he likes me but I don't like him like that." Silence fell between them for what felt like the hundredth time that night. Maeve moved across the room and flicked through Otis' record collection. She mumbled the artists' name as she'd run her finger along the edge. She pulled out a record and placed it into the record player. "I love this one," she smiled to herself. She showed Otis the cover so he knew which one she was talking about. Billie Eilish.

Maeve kicked off her shoes and tucked them neatly by Otis' desk. She moved next to Otis, lying on his bed with her legs hanging off the end. She linked her hands together and rested them on her stomach. Otis mimicked her. He felt a little nervous to be in such close proximity to her but he knew that they were close enough as friends for this to not be a big deal in her head. She lay with her eyes closed and Otis took the opportunity to just look at her. _She is breathtakingly beautiful,_ Otis thought. _Everything about her was perfect. The curve of her lip, the arch of her eyebrow, the dent in her chin, the slope of her nose_. 

"Stop staring at me." Her speaking caused him to jump slightly, and he quickly turned his head to face the ceiling as he lay next to her. He could smell her perfume, mixed in with the subtle smell of shampoo and smoke. The song continued to play in the background. 

_I had a dream_

_I got everything I wanted_

_But when I wake up, I see_

_You with me_

"Otis..." 

"Yeah?" 

"What did your message say? I know you said it wasn't important but it's going to drive me mad." 

Otis considered telling her that he couldn't remember and to leave it, but Maeve would know he was lying. He wanted the simplicity of this moment to last forever, but he knew Maeve would never let it go. 

"Oh, I sent you a voicemail earlier. After I saw my Dad I saw you on the telly. I knew you couldn't answer but I just needed to tell you anyway." 

"What?" Maeve opened her eyes and turned to look at him. He kept his eyes on the ceiling. He looked so tense.

"Just how proud of you I am, and that I've been really stupid. I won't be stupid anymore. I was talking with Ola and she said -"

"You spoke to Ola?" Maeve knew that they weren't together anymore and after the detention and Otis' party, her and Ola had put their differences aside but hearing her name out of Otis' mouth still ignited a pang of jealously deep in Maeve's stomach because at the end of the day, Otis chose Ola over Maeve. And that hurt. 

"Yeah, not for long, she just said to me that I try so hard to be a good guy that I become a not-good guy. I think she's right. I try so hard not to be my Dad, that I lose sight of why I'm doing it, and what's important." Otis took a deep breath and looked at Maeve. He continued, "and that's you, Maeve. I like you. I have liked you for a really long time and when you told me you liked me I was so happy, but I didn't want to break Ola like my Dad broke my Mum, so I pretended I was over you." 

Maeve's chest was bursting with happiness, and a little bit of anger, and a little bit of fear, and she felt like any minute she would explode. She didn't have the right answer for Otis right now so she simply took a deep breath and said, "I don't want to be alone tonight. Can I sleep here?"

Otis wasn't expecting that response, but he figured that it wasn't a rejection, and that was enough for right now. "Sure." Maeve shut her eyes again and tried to conceal her yawn. Otis didn't know what time it was but he was definite that it was really late. Like early hours of the morning - late. He got up and rummaged through his drawers pulling out a t shirt and some joggers, he also grabbed a jumper from his wardrobe and placed them next to Maeve.

"You can sleep in these if you want," he hesitated. 

"Thank you, where is your bathroom?" Maeve collected the clothes up in her arms. 

"First door on your left," he pointed. Maeve exited the room trying to be as quiet as possible. Suddenly, Otis' panic started to set in. Maeve Wiley was sleeping at his house. 

He changed into some joggers and changed the record over which had now scratched to a finish. Then he turned around to see Maeve creeping back into his bedroom. Otis was taller than Maeve so his clothes were too big on her. His joggers had bunched up around her ankles and the sleeves of the jumper came down over her hands. She placed her folded clothes on his chair. _She looked defeated_ , Otis thought. Her eyes were red where she'd attempted to wash off the minimal makeup that still remained on her face and her hair was in a bun on top of her head. Otis moved across the room to her and immediately started rolling up her jumper sleeves. Maeve smiles at Otis and thinks she is the luckiest person in the world right now. Here is a boy - _a really kind, funny, smart boy_ \- who gets her. He doesn't judge her for her family, he just sees her for everything she is despite that. _What a privilege it is to be loved this way_ , she thinks. She slid under Otis' bed covers and tucks her knees up to her chest, making herself as small as possible.

She never in a million years thought that her day would end like this, but she's so glad it did. She opened her eyes again when Otis began to talk.

"So I'll be on the sofa - if you need anything... that's where I'll be." 

Maeve looked at Otis, and bit her nails on her thumb. "Could you stay here?" 

Otis nodded, worried his voice would betray him. Silently, he climbed in beside Maeve. Instantly aware of the small amount of room in the bed and how close he and Maeve were, he reached out to switch off the lamp light and the darkness consumed the room instantly. Maeve turned then and curled into his side. She sighed contently as Otis stretched his arm around her and hugged her close. She could hear his heartbeat under her head, and rise and fall of him breathing made her feel calm. She lay her hand across his chest. 

"I can feel your heart beating." She laughs softly into the pitch black of the room. He doesn't know where the confidence came from but he picked up her hand and interlocked their fingers. 

"I like that you're here, Maeve." 

"Me too," she whispers, "and Otis, I really like you too." Otis had never felt happiness quite like this. He didn't know what to do, so he smiled into the pitch black grateful for everything he did that led to this moment. To anyone else who could see, they would've thought he was crazy but he didn't care. Maeve was here, and Maeve liked him back.

Pretty soon, both Maeve and Otis were fast asleep. Neither of them knew what this meant for them or their friendship. Tomorrow they would have to figure that out, but for now - here in the pitch black of Otis' bedroom, everything was perfect and nothing could change that. 


	2. friends.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's beautiful, she thought. Otis wasn't someone people would consider to be good-looking. He didn't have perfect hair, his body wasn't chiselled with abs and muscle, and he was really awkward. But to Maeve, he was perfect. Just the little things that she noticed made her like him even more. The fact that he laughs way too hard at his own jokes, or the fact that he listens and remembers silly things that she likes and doesn't like, or the fact that his eyes turn a darker blue when he's tired. He just understood her, and to Maeve, that was enough. She smiled at him and moved to sit at the head of the bed. She pulls the duvet up to her shoulders so only her head is poking out. Otis laughed at her. 
> 
> OR 
> 
> Maeve and Otis, the next morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hadn't orignally planned for this to be longer than a one shot but a few people had asked so I tried to deliver.  
> Finding inspiration for this second part was tough, but I've decided this will be 3 chapters long. <3!  
> The bold writing is text messages, and the italics are thoughts.  
> The title inspiration is from Ed Sheeran’s song, Friends. Recommend listening before reading <3

Otis stirred awake. He felt unusually hot. Normally, his room was the coldest in the house so he tended to sleep with the covers over him regardless of the weather. He then remembered that Maeve was asleep against him. Her weight leaning into his side. It wasn't heavy, just comfortable. He didn't want to disturb her sleeping so he tried his best to keep his breathing even and tried not to move at all. But this moment was short lived as Maeve rose from the bed and exited quietly. At first Otis panicked slightly because Maeve has the tendency to run when things get complicated. It's not her fault, it's all she knows. He scans the room and sees her shoes still by his desk and her clothes neatly piled on the chair. He breaths out a sigh of relief and sits up properly. 

After washing her hands, Maeve looked into the mirror. _I wish I could disappear,_ she thought. It's not that she regretted telling Otis she liked him last night, but they're going to have to talk about what that means and she does not want to be there for that conversation. Telling him yesterday just felt so normal; easy. But then again, everything is different in the dark. It's like there's this barrier of safety because no one can see you, and you don't feel as bare as you do when the lights come back on. The mornings creep up and expose you and everything you are. Maeve hates mornings. It's like as if the sun is illuminating her faults and flaws and displaying them for everyone to see. She doesn't come across as insecure initially, but in reality, she is the same as every other teenage girl. Loving herself is difficult. She thinks about making a run for it - but she pushes that thought out of her head quickly because Otis didn't deserve that and she remembers how sad Jackson looked when she left his house early without telling him. She'd never do that again. She cups the water from the tap and splashes it over her face, using the towel next to her to pat herself dry. She takes a deep breath and hopes Otis is still sleeping so she can crawl back beside him and pretend the morning isn't here yet. 

She tiptoed into Otis' room and turned to shut the door. 

"Morning!" 

"Shit!" the sudden noise startled Maeve and she turned around to find Otis sat at the end of his bed. 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to make you jump." 

"No, I just didn't realise you were awake."

She was still stood by the door. _He's beautiful_ , she thought. Otis wasn't someone people would consider to be good-looking. He didn't have perfect hair, his body wasn't chiselled with abs and muscle, and he was really awkward. But to Maeve, he was perfect. Just the little things that she noticed made her like him even more. The fact that he laughs way too hard at his own jokes, or the fact that he listens and remembers silly things that she likes and doesn't like, or the fact that his eyes turn a darker blue when he's tired. He just understood her, and to Maeve, that was enough. She smiled at him and moved to sit at the head of the bed. She pulls the duvet up to her shoulders so only her head is poking out. Otis laughed at her. 

"So what are you up to today?" Otis said, desperate to fill the quiet.

"I'm not sure actually. Are you doing anything?" Maeve replied, secretly hoping he wasn't so she could spend the day here with him. 

"Um, I'm not sure. Eric text and said he'll come over in a bit. He probably wants to spill all the gossip about Adam. In fact-" Otis leans to grab his phone from the bedside table, disconnecting the charger wire and checking the time, "- he'll probably be here soon." 

"Oh." Maeve said, "I should probably go before he gets here." She stands and moves to get her clothes to get dressed. 

"You don't have to, you can stay?" Otis didn't want Maeve to feel obligated to leave, because all he wanted was for her to stay. 

"No really, I should go. I have to get my phone from Issac, and then I'll meet Aimee probably"

"Oh yeah, no course." Otis tried his best to cover up his disappointment."Are you hungry? Mum's probably made breakfast" Otis changed the subject.

"Yes, but I should get changed first," she tucked the clothes under her arm and moved to the bathroom once again.   
Otis changed into a red and blue striped top with black jeans. Maeve came back in and she was wearing her Quiz heads outfit which consisted of a yellow blouse, tan trousers and her knitted cardigan. She had pulled her hair up into a bun, leaving her fringe frays of untidy hair framing her face.

"I hate this outfit. Who even thought this was a good match?" Maeve laughed to Otis. 

"Ah come on, you don't look that bad. Just like... a really tall banana." Otis laughed, Maeve tried not to laugh with him but failed and let out a chuckle. 

"Here, put this on. Might be better." He handed her an old band t shirt and a jumper, and turned around nervously when she started to take her cardigan off and then her blouse. When she was done, she poked him in the back to let him know. He looked at her, and if he was being honest, the jumper didn't look much better because nothing really goes with tan coloured trousers, but it was definitely an improvement from the yellow. "Beautiful" he smiled at her.   
"Shut up." she hit back, trying to hide the fact she was blushing. 

They went downstairs for their breakfast, and Jean was sat at the table. Maeve wasn't nervous to talk to Jean. Maybe because she spoke to her last night, or maybe because Otis' house just immediately made her feel welcome. She didn't feel like she stuck out like a sore thumb here. She fit, and she liked it. 

"Morning darling, do you want some pancakes?" Jean said without raising her head from the paper, her reading glasses sit on the bridge of her nose.

"Um, yes please. Mum, you remember Maeve?" Otis looked uncomfortable, internally begging his mother to not ask prying questions. Jean just smiled widely. 

"Yes I do! Hello Maeve, I wasn't expecting to see you today. Pancakes for both of you then?" Jean didn't wait for a reply, just moved to stand at the counter to make up some pancake mix. 

Breakfast went really fast. They ate their pancakes and laughed with each other. Joking back and forth and even Jean joined in. Pretty soon, it was time for Maeve to go because Eric was on his way. They stood at the top of the steps which led to his house, neither of them wanting to say goodbye, or even knowing how. 

"Thank you for letting me stay here last night, I actually slept the best I have in really long time." They were stood close to each other, maybe a little too close, but they neither one of them moved. They didn't want to. 

"You're welcome to stay here any time." Otis said, and he meant it. "Oh and when you get home, please don't listen to my message." She chuckled to herself. She wants to hug him, so she does. She tucks her head over his shoulder and he holds her tightly. All he can smell is her shampoo. Then the hug is over, faster than either of them want it to be. Maeve thanks Otis again and begins walking backwards away from him. She can't take her eyes off him. 

"Can I see you later?" Otis calls to her. She nods then turns around to face the way she is going. She looks at the ground and wills herself not to turn around and go back to him. She doesn't think she could be happier than she is right now. _I love him_ , she thinks. 

As Maeve turns the corner out of Otis' eyesight, he hears Eric call him from the other direction. "Oatcake! I have so much to tell you!" he is practically singing.

"Me too, come on." They go down the steps to his house and head straight for his bedroom. He shuts the door, and locks it because they're talking serious business and he does not need his Mum's input at any point. 

"You start," Otis said. He wanted to listen to what Eric had to say, and if he told him about Maeve first, Eric would get sidetracked and they'd be here all day. 

"Okay, so after the whole thing on the stage with Adam, we were leaving the hall and he met my Mum!" 

"Really?" 

"And! She liked him! Like really liked him!" Eric says still in disbelief. "She was calling him brave, and inviting him over for tea. It was madness!" 

"So what's happening with Rahim?" Otis said, curious because he went to the play with one guy, and ended up leaving with another. 

"I went to find him. Afterwards. He was outside, and he looked sad. Which I was expecting because in the crowd when Adam asked me to hold his hand, Rahim said no and I did it anyway." Eric looked a little bit sad, but Otis knows he likes Adam so that sadness could be misplaced guilt.

"Do you not find it a bit odd, that he asked to hold your hand?" 

"No, because at your party, the one where you basically hit your world apart like a wrecking ball," he side-eyed Otis and smiled, "he came and was sad about me not going on walks with him anymore and he said that he thinks he was bisexual. He was scared, so I tried to hold his hand, to comfort him but then flinched away." 

"Oh, I see. Makes sense. He was trying to prove to you that he wasn't ashamed? So are you and Adam a thing now?" 

"Exactly, and we haven't really labelled it. We are just happy right now." 

"I'm so happy for you Eric, and I know I wasn't really that supportive at first, but I think that it'll be good. You look happy." 

"I'm buzzing." 

"Well, I have news too." Otis said, nervously. 

"Ooh, go on then, spill it." Eric said. Otis was sat on the chair by his desk and Eric was laying across his bed, head in his hands, smiling widely. 

"I like Maeve." 

Eric looked at him confused, "yeah, we know." 

"And Maeve likes me." 

Eric's face lit up again. "No way, Otis! How do you know?"

"I rang and told her yesterday. Well - I left a voicemail. But she never got it. I didn't know that, and then she came over last night. And I asked her if she got it, and then we were

talking and she asked what it said. So I told her."

"WOW. And she said she liked you too?" 

"Yeah. She stayed here last night, she said she didn't want to go home." 

"OH MY GOD, OATCAKE DID YOU SLEEP WITH MAEVE?" Eric said, now suddenly sat upright, really invested in this story. 

"No, I slept next to her. We didn't do anything like that. We didn't even kiss." 

They spoke for the better part of an hour, discussing how they were meeting Maeve and Adam later, and agreed to call tonight. Then they sat in Otis' front room watching Ru Paul Drag Race. Otis wasn't as invested in the show as Eric was, but he watched it because Eric doesn't like watching it at home in case his Dad comes in. 

Maeve weaved her way between the caravans until she found hers. She unlocked the door and climbed inside. She already didn't want to be here. She liked the fact that she was independent and had this home which was hers and she could decorate it herself - but she felt so lonely here. Especially now there were reminders surrounding her of what she had and now she doesn't. Elsie's teddy that sits on the sofa, and her blanket which covers Maeve's bed. The book her Mum was halfway through 'reading', folded corners and half worn. She slumped her blouse and cardigan from her arms onto the table and got herself a drink of water. She wants to go and get her phone, but she doesn't want to see Issac just yet. She bites the bullet and heads over. She knocked on Issac's door, her palms slightly clammy. _Why I am so nervous?_ , she thought.   
"Come in," he shouted from inside. She opened the door but stayed on the outside, leaning on the door frame.   
"Hey." 

"Well, that was a long time going to the shops, and you forgot the milk" Issac joked.

"I'm sorry. I was going to the shop, then I missed the turn and ended up at Otis', you know the boy from the party." 

"That's alright. Was you there all night?" 

"Yeah" she felt guilty, she doesn't know why because she made it clear to Issac from the start she wasn't interested. 

"Lucky you. Actually, no, lucky him. Because he is lucky to have you Maeve. I just hope he's good enough and treats you right, you know. You deserve it." 

"Thank you Issac. Oh also, did I leave my phone here last night?" Maeve said looking to his caravan and around to the side where she thinks she left it. 

"Yeah actually." Issac moved his chair down the length of the caravan to the living space where it lay on the coffee table. He hands it to Maeve, looking sheepish. 

"I should go. I'm really sorry again about last night." 

"Consider it forgotten. Really, I'm a big boy." 

Maeve laughed and exited Issac's home and went back to hers. She was feeling less guilty about leaving him yesterday. Issac was a good guy and he understood. She went into her room and plugged her phone in to charge.

_Waiting for her phone to charge seemed like forever, but when it did, she already had 6 messages from Aimee._

**Hey babes. Are you sure you don't wanna come over? We are just watching the telly?Xxx" (10:06pm)**

**Steve stayed over last night. I thought he'd wanna have sex but he was fine with us just cuddling xx I don't think I'm ready yet to have sex with him Xxxx (6:04am)**

**I know you're probably still sleeping 'cos it's super early but Steve woke me up on his way out to go to the gym and now I can't sleep again xxx (6.05am)**

**Are you okay babes?? (7.38am)**

**Helloooo!! (7:40am)**

**I can come over today if you want? We can play Scabby Queen. I think I'm getting better!Xxxx (10.02am)**

She replied as soon as she'd read them all. 

**(Hey. Sorry I left my phone at Issac's last night. I'm okay, but I have so much to tell you. Come over whenever you want I'm home now X (10.30am)**

Maeve jumped in the shower straight after she text Aimee. She figured if she showered now, she wouldn't have to rush later when she was meeting Otis. 

As she got out the shower, Aimee was sat on her sofa. 

"Hey babes. I did shout when I came in but I figured you didn't hear me and I heard the shower so I just waited." 

"Okay, let me just change out of this towel and I'll be through. How was last night with Steve?" she shouted through to the living area from her bedroom. She put on Otis' band shirt and a pair of her pyjama trousers and tied her hair up into a bun. 

"It was good. You should've come over babes, we just watched some telly and then we went to bed. He started kissing me and you know, doing stuff and I was a bit nervous that he'd want to have sex but then when I told him I didn't want to, he just said that's okay and we cuddled. It was really nice." Maeve was happy for Aimee. She was working through her trauma and Steve was being really patient with her, and helping her instead of pressuring her. 

"Well, I couldn't come over last night anyway." Maeve smirked knowing Aimee would be bursting to hear what she was about to say. 

"Where did you go? Did you get with that Issac from the party?"

"No. I went to Otis'." Maeve tried to hide her own happiness, but when Aimee yelled with excitement, Maeve couldn't help but let her happiness show. 

"No way! Babes tell me everything! What happened?"

Maeve thought about how much she should really share because sometimes Aimee worried too much about Maeve being on her own, so Maeve has to be careful with how much she tells her. "Well, Mum and Elsie left again yesterday, and I was sat here bored, so I went to Issac's. He was really nice and offered to make me an omelette, but he had no milk so I went to go to the shop, but ended up at Otis' house. He invited me in and we were talking til like 2am it was ridiculous. He told me that he liked me, Aimes." 

Aimee had no words, she just sat there with a wide open toothy smile waiting for the next part of the story. 

"He said that he really liked me, and I didn't know what to say. But I did say I liked him too, and I asked if I could stay there?" 

"Oh my, did you..?" 

"No, we didn't. We just slept, and it was so nice. I'm supposed to be meeting him later and I'm guessing he's going to want to talk about it because we don't actually know what we are. I just don't know where to meet him, I don't want it to be all formal and awkward." 

"Invite him here," Aimee says as if that is the most obvious answer. Maeve was apprehensive to invite him to her place. He has seen the outside before, but it's still quite a small space. _What if he hates it here?_ , she thought. _He has this big, fancy house, and I've got three rooms; a bedroom, a bathroom, and this room._ It's almost as if Aimee can hear the cogs turning in her head because she then adds. "he will like it here. He won't judge you for living here because it's Otis. He won't care." And Maeve knew she was right.   
Maeve asked if Aimee would dry and straighten her hair ready to meet Otis, and then she text him to arrange to meet. 

**Hey, it's Maeve. Do you want to come over about 4? (12.29pm)**

**Yeah 4 is good. Do you want me to bring anything? (12.32pm)**

**No, that's okay. Unless you need anything. (12.34pm)**

**Okay, see you then (12.40pm)**

Maeve was nervous, so was Otis. Otis had told Eric that she was meeting Maeve and he had gone home to get ready because Adam was going to his house for tea. Otis was nervous. Eric had teased him saying how they were going to do the business, but Otis hadn't either thought about it. Now he was nervous, should he take a condom? What is Maeve wants to tell him that she'd rather just be friends? He stood in front of the mirror, moving his hair trying to make it look neater. He cursed himself for being so pathetic, then went downstairs to watch some telly with his Mum before he was going. 

"I'm going to see Maeve later." Jean was taken aback at the fact Otis was willingly telling her stuff about his personal life. 

"Okay, will you be staying there?" 

Otis didn't know what to say. He didn't know. He shrugged, and said that he would text her if he wasn't coming home. 

"I sense that you and Maeve are getting closer. Do you need to tell me anything?" 

"Not yet." Otis knew that all his Mum wanted was for them to not have secrets. Right now, though, he didn't actually know what he and Maeve were.   
They watched TV for the next two hours together; laughing too loudly, joking with each other, having in depth discussions about whether they would invest in the creations on Dragon's Den and singing along to the tunes in the advert breaks. 

At around quarter past 3, Otis left on his bike to go to Maeve's. He was nervous, but quite excited. They both knew their friendship wasn't going back to how it was before, and he's excited to see what was yet to come. He wanted this.   
He stopped by the shop and bought a small bunch of flowers. They were a small bunch of purple flowers. He didn't know what kind they were, but they looked pretty. He placed them into his rucksack and continued on to Maeve's house. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the idea of both of them just spilling to their best friends about everything that happened. The next chapter will be them talking, hopefully have that in the next few days!  
> 


	3. call me in the morning, you can talk to me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She could see Otis' bright blue eyes shifting across her facial features and usually this would make her feel insecure. However, Otis had this way of making her feel like the most beautiful person in the room. She'd never felt so loved. Uh, liked, she corrected in her head. It is way too early to be thinking about saying love. Even though I know I love him, she thought. She loved that he wore his emotions all across his face, and right now he looked at her like she hung the moon. They stayed like that for a few minutes, just being present and absorbing everything there was to about this moment.
> 
> OR 
> 
> Otis and Maeve finally talk about their relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long. This week has been a rollercoaster but it's finally finished. I'm not entirely happy with it because I find conversations difficult to write but I hope you guys like it.   
> Chapter title inspiration is a song by Billy Locket, call me in the morning. Recommend listening before you read, as always <3

Otis parked his bike against the caravan he knew was Maeve's. He's been here before, but he has never been inside. At first he was taken aback by the idea of meeting at Maeve's caravan because from what he can understand Maeve didn't like people knowing where she lived. Maeve hates having people over, except Aimee. Aimee and Maeve have known each other for years and Maeve trusts Aimee enough to know she won't judge her for living in the caravan park, so it is different. But to everyone else, Maeve was very secretive about her living situation. Otis knows it's because most of the people at their school are rich, with large homes and wide gardens filled with patio furniture; Maeve barely had a house. Otis wiped his clammy hands against his jeans and knocked the door. 

Maeve heard the knock at the door and froze. Part of her regretting inviting Otis over. A bigger part of her wanted to trust Otis and share her life with him, and to her, this was the best place to start. She swings the door open and there he is stood, in all of his awkwardness. 

"Hi" he waved. 

"Hi, do you want to come in?" she smiled a tight lipped smile and moved to the side for him to step into the mobile home.   
"Okay." The first thing he notices is the colour. It is definitely not Maeve. The next thing he notices is how worried Maeve looks. He is still stood by the door but Maeve has moved and is leaning against the sink in the kitchen area, chewing on her thumb nail. 

"It's nice in here. I like it."

"Shut up, no you don't. No one would like it. But hey, at least it's mine." Maeve shrugged. 

Otis moves to the table and lays down his rucksack and coat, "Oh I got you something!" Otis said, changing the topic and Maeve was grateful for it. "Here" he said, after rummaging around in his bag and pulling out slightly wilted, flattened purple flowers. "Sorry, they're a bit flat I had to put them in my bag." 

"You got me flowers?" Maeve's face lit up. Secretly, she loved flowers. Initially she comes off as one of those girls who find flowers insulting because she doesn't fit the stereotypes of girls, but really, she found flowers quite beautiful. 

"Uh yeah, I saw them and I thought you'd like them." 

"I do, they're lovely. Thank you Otis." She took them from his grasp and laid them onto the counter. She moved to fill the empty vase on the window with water and then placed the purple flowers in. She placed them proudly on the side. "I hope you didn't mind coming here. I just figured we could talk and watch something on the telly, or we could go somewhere if you'd rather." 

"Yeah, no. I don't mind coming here. We can stay here and watch something. And talk, obviously. Talking is also something we could do." Maeve laughed under her breath, Otis was so nervous and it was clear across his face. 

"Are you okay?" she asked him after a short while.

"Yeah, I'm just nervous. I'm not sure why." He was sat at the table, rubbing his hands across his jeans. 

"I'm nervous too. A bit. It's because yesterday was an emotional day for both of us, and we said stuff which under different circumstances we would've kept hidden." She kept talking plural as if she was talking about both of them, but in reality she had no idea whether he was bothered by any of this.

"Yeah" 

She carried on, airing her concerns "We're also nervous that the other person doesn't feel the same now the emotions have settled. I mean, it's easy to bare your soul in the middle of the night, but then the daytime comes and the stuff you were feeling the night before is gone." She lets out a breath she didn't even realise she was holding. "But I haven't stopped thinking about you all day; nothing has changed for me. I like you, Otis." 

Otis smiled, and moved to stand in front of her. "Nothing has changed for me either. I meant everything I said yesterday, Maeve. I like you, and have for a long time." Maeve smiled widely at that. "But," Otis continued, "where do we go from here? If we decided to give this a go - if we decided on doing this, what if it doesn't work? I don't want to lose you." 

"I don't want that either. I'm rubbish at relationships Otis." Maeve wasn't used to being this vulnerable, but she felt safe. She wanted Otis to know she was serious about this. "I am not good at trusting people, but I'm trying to get better at it. The reason that Jackson and I never worked was because we didn't trust each other. But everything I couldn't share with him, you already know. I trust you." Maeve sighed. If she's being honest, she also felt relieved. It was good to have someone to lean on, and know that they'd be there for once. 

"We should agree," Otis said, "we're friends before anything." Maeve smiled widely and nodded. _Is this actually happening?_ Otis realised then that all of his nerves had gone, and he was calm. So had Maeve's. It was a beautiful realisation, knowing they didn't have to be nervous with each other because all of the hard stuff and the embarrassing stuff, the other person knew; the space they shared together was a safe one. 

"Maeve, I know it's not some grand gesture, and I'm not really all that cool, but I want you to be my girlfriend. So will you? Be my girlfriend I mean." 

"Of course, idiot." Maeve laughed, then added "I hate grand gestures." 

"Me too" Otis shrugged. He took her hand and stared into her eyes. He was elated. He wanted to remember this moment forever, the happiness on Maeve's face made his heart beam, and it was even better knowing that he was the reason. 

Maeve was also ecstatic. She could see Otis' bright blue eyes shifting across her facial features and usually this would make her feel insecure. However, Otis had this way of making her feel like the most beautiful person in the room. She'd never felt so loved. _Uh, liked,_ she corrected in her head. _It is way too early to be thinking about saying love. Even though I know I love him_ , she thought. She loved that he wore his emotions all across his face, and right now he looked at her like she hung the moon. They stayed like that for a few minutes, just being present and absorbing everything there was to about this moment. Until Otis' text alert sounded on his phone and shook him out of the trance he'd found himself in. He dropped Maeve's hand and turned to grab his phone. It was Eric. 

**Hey man, going to Adam's for food so won't be back until later. I'll ring you tomorrow instead. Good luck with Maeve!**

"Sorry, it's Eric. He going for tea at Adam's." 

"No that's cool. They must be getting somewhat serious then?" 

"Yeah, I mean it's still really early but Eric seems to enjoy his company a lot." 

"Good." Maeve said. Her and Eric weren't the best of friends, in fact they weren't even that close but she liked Eric. He made her laugh, and she knows that he cares about her and Otis. She would like him to be happy. 

"Should we watch something?" Maeve suggested.

"Yeah, what can we watch?" 

"Well, I don't have Netflix. But I got a few DVDs" Maeve isn't like most teenagers who spend their whole time watching television or stuck to her phone. She can't afford to. She can barely pay her rent let alone have a Netflix account or get data for her phone to have internet. The DVD's she does have are old ones Sean used to steal for them to watch when he'd be trying to hide the fact their Mum had ran off for the 100th time. She's seen each one at least 6 times, so she usually opted to read. Books to rent from the library are free, so that's what she did. 

"You can have my Netflix, Maeve. I didn't realise you couldn't watch good telly." 

"No it's alright, I don't really watch it anyway."

"Doesn't matter. Just have it for when you finish your books, and the library is shut. Or you might just fancy a change of entertainment. There's some brilliant feminism movies on there I'm sure you'd love them." 

"Is there?" Maeve said, suddenly intrigued. 

"I don't know." He laughed, "but now you can look yourself." Otis said handing the remote to Maeve after having downloaded and punched in his login. Maeve scrolled down the long list of films and TV shows, scanning the genres. There was so much to choose from. 

"Well, is there anything you want to watch?" Maeve asked. She didn't take much interest when Aimee would talk about television shows with her because she'd never get to watch them, so she really didn't know what people liked. 

"We should start a TV show." Otis said. He liked the idea of them spending days on end just binging a TV show.

"Okay. What one?"

"Well, I've been wanting to watch Orphan Black." Maeve pulls a confused face, clearly having no idea what that is about. "It's about clones. I haven't started it yet but from what I can gather it's about these women who don't know they're clones and they're basically part of a huge nature vs. nurture experiment. Seems pretty good." 

"Sounds unrealistic," Maeve scoffed. 

"Always so critical." Otis rolled his eyes playfully. Maeve smiled proudly, and put the show on anyway. 

By the third episode, they both had become more comfortable in watching the telly together. Otis had laid down propped up against the back of the sofa, and Maeve had curled into his side. She was wrapped in a small blanket after she claimed she was cold about 20 minutes in. They were laughing, and debating the ethics of human cloning. They were discussing all the different clones, and which ones were their favourites. Maeve liked Sarah, because she was the leader. She didn't tell Otis that Sarah reminded her of herself, she just said "Sarah just looks cool." Otis liked Cosima. He thought her dreads made her look nice and he likes smart people. They had been quiet for a short while, Otis was holding onto Maeve's hand loosely placed on his chest then he felt her hand go limp when she'd given in and fallen asleep. He noticed her trying to hide her yawns a little while ago and he knew she'd fall asleep pretty soon. He paused the episode and the time popped up in the corner of the television. **8.56pm**. He really should be getting home soon, and leave Maeve sleep. 

He tried to rise from the sofa without waking Maeve but her being the light sleeper she is immediately stirred awake. 

"Did I fall asleep?" she asked, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. 

"Yeah, but you didn't miss anything." He said gesturing to the television. "We can finish the episode tomorrow, if you want." 

"I'm meeting Mrs Sands and the Quiz Heads tomorrow. They want to do an official celebratory thing, I think we're just having a picnic at the school. But, we can meet after?" 

"Sure. It's almost 9 o'clock so I'm going to head home." He realised then that they both were whispering, and he didn't really know why. Maeve's eyes looked heavy with exhaustion but Otis noticed the sadness flash across her face when he said he was leaving, and it broke his heart. He moved from standing to kneel in front of her so he could look her in the eyes. 

"Are you alright here? I'll message you when I get home, and tomorrow." 

"Yeah course." Maeve smiled. "You can stay if you want, don't feel like you have to go." 

"I told Eric I'd meet him pretty early, and I need to help Mum tomorrow. She's decided we should clean out the house of things we don't need anymore. She has been reading that KonMari decluttering." Otis facepalmed. "You can come over after your thing with the Quiz Heads, make a cleaning day a little less torturing." Maeve brightened at that. She rose from the sofa and Otis stood up too. He put his shoes on, and his coat, then grabbed his rucksack. He looked at Maeve and all the fly-aways in her hair, and thought, _she's so beautiful._

"What?" she said, clearly noticed that he's staring.

"You're just really pretty," He said, trying to be casual, "and I'm just glad you're my girlfriend." 

"I'm glad too," she beamed.

Otis walked out of the caravan and Maeve came out of the door to stand in front of the steps by her door. He went to get on his bike but then he stopped, and turned around.

"Maeve?" The kitchen light through the open door illuminated his face a soft orange colour against the evening sky. She didn't answer him. She just moved and kissed him, his hands instantly coming up to frame her face. Otis is convinced he sees fireworks. It is so much better than anything he could've imagined. _I am kissing Maeve Wiley and she is my girlfriend._ Otis is convinced he is going to wake up from the dream any moment.

They pull back, their faces still really close together. 

"That's what I was going to say." Otis tilted his head, smirking. 

"Shut up Dickhead. Go on, get home before it gets really dark." 

He steals another peck from her before he grabs his bike and hops onto it. He cycles away, getting off again to push his bike up the really steep hill and then he speeds of out of sight.

Maeve knows she loves Otis. And she is pretty sure Otis loves her too. Maybe there is room for another person in small house with four chairs and big windows. Maybe, just maybe, she won't be alone. She likes the idea of sharing it with Otis. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayy, I tried to incorporate Orphan Black because I absolutely love it. Sarah and Maeve have so many similarities, and I csan imagine Otis finding Cosima really attractive even if she is a lesbian. 
> 
> I hope this wasn't too disappointing. And thank you for all the great feedback I got from this. I loved writing this as a first fic <3

**Author's Note:**

> To listen to the poem from the title, it's on youtube.  
> Rudy Francisco - Turning Tables

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Could be love if we made it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26307940) by [Midnightsummerdreams](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnightsummerdreams/pseuds/Midnightsummerdreams)




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